Why is positive thinking not working for me?
Many people feel positive thinking is not working for them as they are not able to generate any results.
Lots of people will say positive thinking doesn’t work for them.
Whenever I try to think positive and stay positive for some time nothing turns up as I expect, making me change my mind.
Positive thinking is a myth, nothing happens well, just by thinking positive.
And so on….
What is positive thinking?
Positive thinking is a mindset, the way of looking at the things around you. Reacting positively to the bad and negative situations you face. Saving yourself from falling into the spiral of depression, resentment and making you miserable. With a positive approach, we can overcome any negative situation. Bad things happen to all but how we react to them shows our mindset or our approach towards life.
Let’s consider a situation of heartbreak. Positive thinking never means that you will not face breakups or heartbreaks. With this you will be able to look at the things positively and will be able to accept the situation to move further in life. There are chances that life may throw a better opportunity at you after this incident. But if you will be stuck in resentments and pain, you will never be able to get the positive outcome of your actions.
Positive thinking never guarantees to fulfil your demands or dreams. Some people may think that by thinking positively they can bargain to get the desired results. You will get what you rightly deserve, but with positive thinking you will be able to fight all the problems, taking them as challenges and opportunities.
What is the problem with positive thinking?
Whenever we talk about positive thinking, people consider it to be enough for achieving their goals. One must remember to take action for reaching the goals. Our life is made up of experiences may be good or bad, but every experience is required to build our character. As quoted by Frank Sonnenberg – ” Throw away the bad experience, but save the lesson”.
Let’s consider one more situation over here, Jack (taken as an example) has to participate in the marathon, he thinks he will be able to complete the race of 22Kms as he was a regular runner at university 5 years back and hence gets his name registered. Being occupied in the office he feels lazy and doesn’t practice running. On the day of the marathon he tried but was not able to complete the race.
Having a positive thought about running will not help Jack in completing the race.
Your thoughts have to be supported by the series of actions for achieving the goals.
How to make positive thinking work?
Positive thinking if applied correctly to life will do miracles. You will be able to recover from the failures, heartbreaks and will never lose the momentum of your life. Below are a few ways that will help you to find the reason why you failed to implement the positive thinking in your life. Also these will help in strengthening your efforts for being positive in life.
1. Fight out the negative thinking with positive attitude
You can’t be positive in life with negative thoughts banging your head every now and then. We may have some negative thought patterns developed based on our past experiences. One must understand that what happened was just the experience and is not determined to happen again and again.
Cure your negative thoughts first and with a clear mind except the positive thinking.
2. Don’t just think positive, have positive attitude
Just by saying positive things about yourself or about your job or anything will not help you. One must believe in them. If you don’t believe, thinking is not going to take you anywhere.
Feeling and believing are very important for positivity.
3. Support your thoughts with proofs
Sometimes it’s hard for us to believe in positive things about ourselves. Do ‘SWOT’ analysis, take help from others, take feedback etc. and find a logic or proof to support your thinking.
When supported with reasonable logic will be easily accepted by our mind.
4. Find a right goal and a reason for the same
Many times people work on others suggestions and assume it as their goals. When we work on someone else’s idea we may get lost in the midway resulting in failure. Hence even if the idea came from some other source, find the real reason you want to work on it, align it with your goal and give all your efforts in that direction.
5. Don’t deny your fears, face them with optimism
Being positive never means you start denying your fears. Many people hate accepting their flaws and fears. Not accepting or concealing is not going to help you.
Face your fears with courage and solve them, trust me they won’t be as big as you think they are.
6. Work on roots rather than polishing the top to hide
Very few of us are born talented and the rest of us have to learn and train. Don’t be shy in learning a new skill at any age in life rather than hiding and covering it up. Cover ups won’t work in the long run.
Find the real reason and try to solve it, be a problem solver.
7. Focus on what you want rather than what not
Sometimes we don’t know what we want in life and keep on chasing off what we don’t want. Even when thinking positive we don’t know what we want but keep on reciting for all positives to happen.
The secret to get good results is to focus on what we want.
8. Never ignore reality and have positive attitude
There are certain things beyond our control for example pandemics, lay-offs, elections, price hike etc. positive thinking never says to ignore reality but to prepare for the same. Find the ways to solve your issues rather than feeling bad and stuck for uncontrolled situations.
For example in a cricket match two teams put their efforts till the last ball of the match, although only one team can win. But the failure won’t refrain the losing team from playing the next time.
I hope these will help you in finding how to make positive thinking work in your life. Winning a battle is only possible with a positive approach and preparing for all possible outcomes. Fighting again and again till you succeed.
Please do comment in case you have some worries or want me to help in finding your way to positive thinking.